Six Flags Status

Some days are harder than others. I have the blessing of living knowing that I’m ok and going to be ok for a long time and most days I wake up and go about my day with absolute normalcy. Honestly, a normalcy I questioned that I would ever have again during my first few days after learning I had cancer. However, there are just those days where I’m overwhelmed with thoughts and swimming in a sea of questions I will never know the answers to. Some days the lack of answers lingers and makes me feel like something is wrong again, and it takes some talking to before I get my mind straight again.

But while my faith is always in Jesus and my spirits are high because of the peace in my heart, this road has not and will not be easy. I have cried more tears than I care to admit and my thoughts have been darker than I thought I was capable of. I wont tell you I didn’t doubt or question the Lord through this either. When you go into a major surgery thinking your perfectly fine and come out with the news of cancer, your ground shakes just enough to make you question how you are ever going to be able to trust anything you’re told medically again.

That’s only a small sample of the fear and dread that bumped into my skull a few times, but the Lord found a way to give me peace in even the hardest of moments even if it meant He had to shout and wave around like a fool to get my attention. So these days ahead will be long. I will be tired. And I will be up, and I will be down. But I know I’m healthy and I’m healed, and today…that’s all I need.

 

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